Student Life

Exams.  Studying. Parties.  Midterms. Projects.  Thesis. Group work.  Grades. Tests.  Tuition. Work. Roomates.  

Oh, the life as a student.  Sure, being a student has its benefits even beyond the educational side of it, but it also comes with inevitable stress.

You're bouncing around from class to class, buildings to libraries, dealing with the pressures of exams & midterms, and all the while you're fighting a cold or the flu, you have 4 projects that are worth 60% of your final grade, and it's only the second week back in this semester.

Student life is not easy.  There is a lot of pressure to excel & succeed, and it can be truly overwhelming.  For those of us who have surpassed the post secondary education part of our lives, there are definitely times of stress that will forever stick in our memories.

Students can often wear themselves down when they don't take the appropriate measures to take care - of their physical selves, as well as their mental selves.  In fact, when a student continues down a slippery slope of not taking care of themselves, one may potentially experience depression, anxiety, panic attacks, and thoughts or actions of self harm or suicide.

This doesn't mean that if you're having a particularly bad day or week that all of a sudden you're going to have these thoughts running through your mind, however it is possible.

How can a student take care of their overall being?  It's not always going to be easy, but with practice, students can adapt to coping skills that will benefit them all school year round.

TIPS

- Diet & Exercise - 
This does not mean you have to hit up the gym 5 days a week on top of your regular schedule and buy all organic foods, but it does mean to eat healthy meals (skip the fast food in the cafeteria and go for some homestyle cooking, or a fresh salad/soup combo) and to try and get at least 30 minutes of exercise in your day.  A great tool to help you get moving, are the active wear bracelets that you can sync to your smart phone.  A gentle vibration will remind you when you haven't moved in awhile - get your heart rate up with a walk, go for a skate on the canal, or hit up the gym!

- Do Something For YOU - 
Finding something that you love to do, will help ease the stress!  If it's going for a mani/pedi, or grabbing the guys to watch a game at the local pub, or if it's simply cranking the music and letting it all out in an impromptu dance party, do it!  

- Furry Friends - 
Do you have a pet in your home?  Or a friend with a dog or a cat?  Studies have shown that just 15 minutes with a furry friend can help ease major stress.  Many universities have Pet Therapy Programs, where animals who have gone through therapy training will visit on designated days, to help brighten the lives of students.  Ask your Student Centre if anything like this exists and how you can attend!  Or, visit your local Humane Society and volunteer as a dog walker.

- Talk It Out - 
Knowing that you have a place to turn to in your time of stress is helpful.  This is where we at the Distress Centre come in handy.  Since we're 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, we are always here, ready to listen and support you.  If you're cramming for a test or a midterm and are at your wit's end, pick up the phone and call us.  Talking about what ails you, is one of the best ways to cope.  Our Crisis Line Responders are non judgmental, unbiased, and are people, just like you & I.  

If you have a student in your life, pass along our blog post so that we can help each of them get through potentially tough times.

We're always here, and always ready to listen : 613-238-3311

Back To School - College and University

Their room is packed into boxes in the car, they've bid farewell to their hometown, and are ready to start their post-secondary career in the field that they feel they want to venture into.  Or maybe they're staying at home to attend the closest college/university and do a daily commute.

Regardless of their choice, your child has now become a young adult, and is taking baby steps into the world of college & university.

I can still remember my parents dropping me off at Loyalist College in Belleville - the furthest I was willing to go away, and I was going to be living in residence with 5 other girls I had never met before, and going to this school, where I knew a total of 2 people.  Nervous?  You bet.  Best two years of my school career?  Absolutely.  (In fact, it's where I met my now spouse!)

That first month where your student is learning their way around campus, what studying is REALLY like, how to cook for themselves, how important sleep really is, where they need to concentrate, how to make new friends, and most importantly, how to succeed in school.

But with all of those things, can come stressful times.  Anxiety, depression, stress come very easily to post-secondary students as they are learning the way of the world.  OSAP, student loans, finances, how to control money - it can send an 18 year old spinning out of control.  I saw many students in my college years, spending their OSAP on stereos, televisions and unfortunately, at the bars.  Bullying can also continue into the post-secondary stage, making it feel like it's a never-ending cycle.

Some students find themselves enjoying the party scene of college/uni more than classes, and end up missing classes, sleeping in class, and watching their GPA drop, and drop quickly.

Then come mid-terms & exams.  This is possibly one of the most stressful times for a college/uni student, as quite often, their mark on the exam is worth 50% or more of their final grade.  It is not uncommon to see students at their breaking point during exam time, to see them get sick, depressed, and not eat well, and some even find themselves extremely depressed and end up with suicidal ideations.

How can you as a parent, help your child through their post-secondary school?  

• Schedule weekly phone calls (or weekly dates if they're at home) to stay connected
• Teach them how to cook healthy meals
• Teach them how to do their laundry
• Show them how to manage their money through a budget, how to pay bills, how to properly use a credit card (consider one with a small credit limit of $500)
• Explain how to manage their stress (we're here 24/7 for your students to call!)
• Talk about a healthy lifestyle that doesn't involve substance abuse
• Go and visit!  They'll be so proud to show you around campus and their classrooms.
• Listen.  You'll be able to see the emotions your child is dealing with, and listening without judgement will help your student get their feelings under control.

If your student is having problems with the course they are taking, it's not a bad thing.  It can simply mean their passion isn't in that area of focus.  They can work with a school liaison to find the right course for them.

...pat yourself on the back parents, you've gotten your child out of elementary, middle and high school and into their post-secondary education!  (or, into the work world!).  This can also be difficult on you, emotionally, mentally and financially.  Be sure that you have a good support system in your life as well, as you will also be dealing with your own stuff.  

As always, don't forget that we are here, for you and your post-secondary students, for whatever you're dealing with.  We're here 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, no matter what, simply by calling 613-238-3311.

Best wishes for this school year, to all of the students out there!

Back To School - High Schoolers

Whether you have a "minor niner" starting high school or one entering into Grade 12, high school is four years of your child's life, that are some of the most emotional, difficult and overwhelming years.

Grade 9

The "Minor Niners" year.  Do you remember the feeling of walking into the large high school, feeling completely lost and nervous about where you locker is, how to find your classroom, where the cafeteria is, if you'd be picked on by an older student?  Those feelings are still around today for new ninth graders, but with a lot more concerning issues, like bullying, fitting in, sexual orientation and more.

One of the easiest ways for a ninth grader to get started, is to stick with someone they know.  Often, students will venture into a high school with someone they've already been going to school with for most or at least part of their lives.  Strength in numbers!  Your student will be able to have that friend closeby for assistance, or even just to have someone to talk to, as they meet new friends.

Ensuring that your child is safe & happy is one of the most logical concerns a parent can have.  Does the school have a zero tolerance for bullying?  Is your child someone who is friendly to everyone, or are they a potential bully themselves?  Are they involved in clubs or sports?  These are all excellent questions to keep in mind and to talk to you kids about.

Grade 10 

Not at the bottom of the food chain anymore, but not at the very top either.  Students in grade 10 are starting to know what they like and what they don't when it comes to subjects, and will definitely have a few choices for classes and electives.  Sitting down with your student to hash out details of each class together is a great way to learn more about what your high schooler is loving, and ensuring that they are meeting the school's requirements for graduation in a couple of years.  

All of the same concerns listed above can follow your child through their high school career.  Don't assume all of that ends in the 9th grade.

Grade 11

Your student is at the time in their high school career where they are going to be starting to think of post-secondary school or a career.  Now is an excellent time to listen to their hopes for their future, and how you can help them get there.   There comes a bit more expectation and pressure in the 11th grade, with making sure they stay on top of their studies to ensure good grades for college or university.  

This is also one of the times in your students life, where they're falling in love for the first time.  You may think "Oh she/he is just too young to feel that way!" but truth be told, we all had a first love in high school, and if you are honest with yourself, you'll remember the feelings that come with it.  Having the good old "Safe Sex" conversation with your child when they are in their first serious relationship can help you (and them) be more prepared for what can happen.  You'll most likely get a lot of eyerolling and the "Mommmmmm" or "Daaaaaaaaad" "I knoooooooowwwww", but believe me, they will care that you took the time to talk to them.  They will have their hearts broken, and there will be tears, so letting them know you are there, no matter what happens, will help them through tough times.

Grade 12

Top of the totem pole!  College, university or the work world are steps away from your almost graduate.  Finishing up missing credits, college applications, resume building - it's a very, VERY stressful time for your student.  You will invariably see changes in your child's demeanor, so taking time to sit down and talk about everything will help you both through it. 

Now is also the time where your student is just on the brink of being legal age (if in Ontario) and there will be parties, and dances, and more parties, and prom.  Taking time to talk about their responsibilities as a young adult are key, and setting ground rules.  They'll most likely be driving out late with friends now, so talking about being safe while driving to avoid tragedy is a must.

At the end of the day, ensuring that you are understanding and willing to listen to your student's anxiety, stress, depression, happy time, excitable moments, proms, dances, math tests, broken hearts, biology experiments gone awry, and simply being there for your student, is the most important thing. 

Students will be going through a slew of emotions over these 4 years and can easily pick up the phone and call the Distress Centre.  It's free, confidential, and while you may not necessarily know that they've called us, you can rest assured that our fully trained volunteers are here to provide support and listen.  Put our number in the hands of your student before this school year starts, and together we can get through another school year!  613-238-3311 - any time of day or night, we're here.