You Spin Me Right Round, Baby, Right Round

Life isn't always easy.  

You get pulled in 100 different directions at once, between work, family, friends, you're jumping over life's hurdles, you're trying to make ends meet, do the groceries, fold laundry, answer the 10 emails that came in late after you've already left the office.

You keep running in circles, around and around and around and around and....

You fall down.  Hard.

You've burnt yourself out.  You're sick, you're run down, you're physically, mentally and emotionally unable to do ANYTHING else.

Guess what?  You're not alone.

Studies have shown that at least once a year, each and every one of us has that moment, where our bodies just say "hey now, I can't keep going at warp speed".  Then we have what is known as a "nervous breakdown".

A breakdown will vary from person to person, and mean different things to each of us.  Some people may experience severe breakdowns, while others just may need a day to recoup.

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Take "Jamie" for example.  

Jamie is 38 years old.  He works for a retail store that he loves, and does very well with customer service.  Today he's learned that he's been promoted to Store Manager, which includes new responsibilities, like opening & closing, balancing cash, doing deposits, scheduling employees, holding staff meetings, and on top of all of this, he is expected to meet a higher sales quota.  Oh and they're planning a store invite only party that Jamie's boss wants him to take on.  Jamie's grateful for the opportunity, but notices he's a bit more fatigued and has a lingering headache.

Jamie also has a family - his partner of 10 years, and their 2 children.  Jamie's partner, we'll call him Henry, and the kids have a surprise waiting when Jamie gets home from work - a puppy!  A sweet, 8 week old puppy.  Jamie & Henry had discussed waiting until their children were a bit older and more responsible, but he falls in love with the little puppy.  He feels a bit overwhelmed with having two young kids and a puppy, but he figures it will be okay, especially since Henry is a stay-at-home Dad and can train the puppy.  He shakes off the feelings of doubt as just being nervous.

Jamie & family sit down for dinner, and learn that their eldest daughter has a project due for school...tomorrow.  Clear the table, work with the kids to get the project and other homework done.  Jamie's head starts to ache a bit more, so he takes an Advil.

Henry is paying some bills, and sighs, and says to Jamie "I got the quote for the water heater today, and it's going to be about $1000."  Jamie calculates how much he'll have to sell at work to meet his commission to offset the cost, and oh wait, there's the family vacation they wanted to take the kids on when school let out for the summer.  Henry takes little puppy out for a walk while Jamie looks over the numbers, while his head continues to ache.  He's also noticing his eyes are strained.  Maybe he's catching a cold.

Jamie ponders all of this as he tucks his kids into bed, and he and Henry start the housecleaning - laundry, bathrooms, dishes, tend to the gardens.  

As Jamie settles into bed for the night, he starts feeling heavy in the chest, like someone is sitting on top of him.  He didn't even have the strength to shower tonight.  Then one by one, as if he somehow summoned them, the children and the puppy all need his attention.  Jamie's headache is now a full blown migrane and he doesn't think he'll be able to work tomorrow.

Jamie's family all fall asleep, puppy included, for the night, while Jamie struggles to fall asleep, tossing & turning, fighting against the heavy feeling & migrane.  He just can't seem to shake these feelings he's having.  

Jamie's next day starts off even worse.  He wakes up feeling like he's going to cry, and he can't figure out why.  

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Do parts of Jamie's story sound familiar to you?  This is a completely fabricated story that I just made up on the spot.  However made up it is though, this is easily comparable to many people in how a breakdown can begin.

What's disturbing is, many of us don't recognize the signs of a nervous breakdown coming, until it hits us full speed.

If you're experiencing signs of a breakdown, please take the time to assess yourself.  You only have one "You" and you need to take of yourself as well.

How do you ensure that you don't have a nervous breakdown?  Every person is different, but here are some key ways to help avoid a breakdown

• Exercise & eat well
• Get plenty of sleep
• Learn to say no, if you can't handle any additional responsibilities
• Delegate tasks - employees & family members alike
• Use a "To-Do" list & cross things off one by one
• Talk to your doctor if you're having troubles with sleeping, eating, or are concerned for your mental well-being
• TALK.  This is one of the best things you can do for yourself.  Talk about how you are feeling, what you are experiencing, and know that you aren't alone, just as "Jamie" has shown us above.

Finally, know that our volunteers are always here, 24/7, if you need someone to talk to who is unbiased and non-judgmental.  613-238-3311.  Call us anytime.

Life isn't always easy, but it can get easier, starting with a call to the Distress Centre of Ottawa & Region.

Valentine's Day

It's been rumored that Valentine's Day has one of the highest suicide rates out of any day in the year.  Truth is, it doesn't.  While over the course in Canada in 2011, there were 3738 reported suicides, there was no more suicides on Valentine's Day than there were on other days.

In fact, the number of suicides in Canada has dropped from the previously reported numbers.  While we still lost many lives, knowing that 60+ people more than before decided to not take their lives, shows that we are doing something different, something helpful in our communities.  We need to keep improving to save as many lives as we possibly can.

So why do people assume that Valentine's Day shows more suicides than others?  

Mainly because society in general, movies, books, etc, have said time & time again that Valentine's Day are for those in relationships, lovers, partners, husbands & wives, telling someone who means the world to you how you truly feel, and showering that person with gifts, adoration, and love.  

Basically saying, that if you are single on Valentine's Day, you should be feeling:

Depressed - "No one wants to be with me"

Anxious - "Why can't I keep a boyfriend/girlfriend?  What's WRONG with me?"

Stressed - "I'm NEVER going to get married/have kids/buy a house this way!"

Sad - "I wish I had said yes to that person who asked me out last week..."

Suicidal - "If there's no one who loves me, why am I ever bothering with life"

That you should be:

Overeating - "Hellooooooo tub of Ben & Jerry's ice cream.....BFF's?  Okay"

Watching sad movies - "I can't believe Allie doesn't remember Noah!"

Going to single's parties - "All dressed up to meet people I don't want to meet"

Burning your ex's photos - "You wasted so many years of my life!!!!"

But here's the thing:

You don't need to be any of these things!

Valentine's Day is for some people, and for others, it's not.  It's okay to be single, not to have a date, not to get all caught up in the holiday.

Instead of feeding into the above "what you're supposed to feel" emotions, let's make a list of things you love about yourself.

I love myself because ______________________________.

I love this about my mind ___________________________.

I love this about my appearance ______________________.

I love this about my life _____________________________.

I love this about where I live _________________________.

I love that I can do this _____________________________.

I love to do this every day ___________________________.


Change your thoughts, and you'll change your world.

Valentine's Day shouldn't be anything that causes you anxiety, stress or depression, but if it does, and you need someone to talk to, we are ALWAYS here to listen.

Just give us a call at 613-238-3311

Remember to love yourself this Valentine's Day!

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas...Stress

Imagine you're in a snowglobe.

You're the little figurine inside, carrying wrapped up gifts taller than you, you're holding the hand of a little one beside you.

There are trees, and maybe a shopping centre behind you.  

And then there's the snowglobe snow, flying & billowing all around you, in the small dome that surrounds you, coming at you from all directions.

And then it settles on the bottom of the globe, until someone or something shakes it up again.

Starting to sound like your life right now?

You're not alone.

As the holiday season is now upon us, the hustle & bustle of everything is coming to light.

The food.  The shopping.  The wrapping.  The visitors.  The travelling.  The weather.  The parties. 

Pressure.

Stress.

Anxiety. 

Maybe this is your first holiday season after suffering a tragedy or a loss.

Grief.

Sadness.

Depression.

Maybe you have people in your life that you'll be seeing, and you don't want to.

Loss of sleep.

Panic.

Darkness.

Maybe you just are feeling like this is it for you.

Isolation.

Loneliness.

Suicidal thoughts.

You don't need to feel ashamed if you're experiencing any of these thoughts.

The holidays are meant to be bright & merry, to have you happy & healthy, and to end the year with joy in your heart.

Here are some helpful tips that may make sense for you to try out!

TO-DO Lists

I am a huge to-do list person.  I find that if I write out literally everything I have to do, from grocery shopping to packing our overnight bags, that I know as soon as I cross that one item off my list, it's done.  Start with the tasks that you know will take up the most time and get those done first, that way as you get through your list, the easier tasks are on the bottom, and you'll zip right through them.

DELEGATE!

We as humans, want perfection at the holidays, just as we see in the movies, with the big tree decorated, a gorgeous turkey on the table, everyone dressed up and on their best behavior, and that you did it all by yourself.  In reality, we're more like the movie Four Christmases - baby is spitting up, kids are fighting, everyone's tired, the dog is in the garbage & the smoke alarm keeps going off for no reason.  Then someone asks you what they can do to help. Take the opportunity to delegate a task or two this holiday season, and you'll feel so much better, knowing that one thing is off your plate, so to speak.

Cranberry Sauce, a la Bart - kids can help too!  :)  (anyone remember this episode?  It aired 25 years ago this year!)

LESS IS MORE

The age old saying of "Less is more" still rings true today.  Have a budget set out for gift giving?  Stick to it!  What will going over your budget bring you?  Sure more presents under the tree, your kids receiving more...and a hefty credit card bill in January that will cause stress & anxiety.  Why not make some gifts this year? (Search handmade gifts on Pinterest, the possibilities are endless!) Or plan an outing with your family to a local amusement establishment?  (If you're in Ottawa, there's Skyzone, Laser Quest, Top Kart etc!)  Or ask them to fill out the following list:

TALK TO SOMEONE

If you're experiencing feelings of uneasiness, anxiety, sadness, depression, or thoughts of suicide, please know that our phone lines do not close over the holidays.  We have some pretty incredible people on our phones from Christmas Eve, Christmas morning, New Year's Eve & every day in between, to make sure that you have someone to talk to this holiday season.  Every call is completely free & confidential, and we are not here to judge you.  If you need a break between the presents and the turkey, take a few minutes to call us, and we'll be here to listen and support you.  613-238-3311.

From all of us at the Distress Centre of Ottawa & Region, we'd like to wish you a very happy holiday season, filled with joy & love.  Be well!

Battling Substance Abuse

This past weekend, I heard some terrible news.  A friend and co-worker from a previous job had passed from the effects of substance abuse.  Her heart became too weak to do its job, and she was gone.  A sweet, vibrant, funny girl, who always had a smile for you when you were talking to her, a hug for when you were down or got great news, and someone you could always talk to, no matter what.

But she, like many others, had a problem with substance abuse, and while she was trying to clean herself up, they overcame her and took her life.

My heart is heavy, as I think of her family, friends, co-workers, and her two little pups who she loved to the moon and back.

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If you have someone in your life who is dealing with a substance abuse problem, there is help out there for them, and for yourself.

But, how do you know if someone is dealing with substance abuse?  Sometimes, it can be more difficult to spot than on someone else.

Physical Signs Can Include:

• Bloodshot eyes, pupils larger or smaller than usual
• Changes in appetite or sleep patterns
• Sudden weight loss or gain
• Deterioration of physical appearance, personal grooming
• Unusal smells on breath, body or clothing
• Tremors, slurred speech, or impaired coordination

Behavioral Signs Can Include:

• Drop in attendance & performance at work or school
• Unexplained need for money or financial problems
• Engaging in secretive or suspicious behaviors
• Sudden change in friends, interest, activities

Psychological Signs Can Include:

• Change in personality or attitude
• Mood swings, irritability or outbursts
• Unusual hyperactivity, agitation or giddiness
• Lack of motivation, lethargy or lack of concentration
• Appears fearful, anxious, paranoid or becomes panicky for no reason

Not everyone will have these symptoms, and someone else may have all of them.  Substance abuse targets each individual differently.

How can you help someone who has fallen into the substance abuse trap?

• Talk to the person.  If you are comfortable talking to this person, do so.  Talk about your concerns, offer your help and support, and be non-judgmental and unbiased.  
• Don't attempt threats or bribes
• Provide resources, like the Distress Centre's phone number 613-238-3311 and information about rehabilitation for the person, but be prepared to hear that they don't want or need help.  This happens more often than not, but it's not your fault for offering.
• Research substance abuse rehabilitation programs in your area for them to help take the pressure off of them finding one.  Keep it to 3-5 choices, max.  
• Listen to them.  There is a reason that the substance has taken over the person's life.
• Don't hide, throw away or do the drugs or alcohol with the person.  
• Don't argue with the person when they are under the influence
• Do let them know that you are there to help them (if that is the case) when they are ready and willing.

Also, be sure to take care of yourself during this time - ensure that you too have support.

All of this being said, substance abuse comes from somewhere.  It is the age old question of "What came first, the chicken or the egg?".  Did the person start abusing because he/she is dealing with something in their lives they wanted to escape from?  Did she/he start abusing and then with the effects of abusing, came depression, anxiety, etc when they weren't using, so they had to use to "stay normal"?  Only the person abusing knows for sure.

While getting clean and sober is a scary feat for so many, there are hundreds of thousands - possibly millions who have done it, and stayed clean and sober for a very long time.

If you or someone you know needs to talk about their lives, their substance abuse, or are looking for community resources, we are here to listen and provide support.  You can call us at anytime of day or night at 613-238-3311.

I'd like to close this post off with a simple Rest In Peace for my friend whose smile and warm heart I will remember for a very long time.

(Name of deceased is withheld from this post)

Welcome Home, Soldiers.

This morning, on my daily commute into work, as I was congested in the traffic going west on the 417, a plane caught my attention.  It wasn't a normal commercial airliner flying in.  This was a massive, grey plane, with another small plane following just behind.

I watched it as I was stopped on the highway, trying to figure out what kind of plane this was.  Traffic started moving, and I was on my way to the office again.

On my normal social media check when I got into the office, this tweet came across from our friend Alison at CFRA:

Cue feelings of happiness.  Happiness for the families being reunited, children meeting their dad for the first time, partners holding on to one another not wanting to let go.  Happiness for each of the 93 troops, who have made it home to Canadian soil.  Happiness for our country.

Welcome home, soldiers.  

In the recent months, there have been many stories of soldiers taking their lives, after returning home from overseas.  Seeing unimaginable, tragic scenes, battling, losing comrades, incredibly long, hot days, and cold nights, even coming home can be terrifying. These things can become inner demons, that these brave soldiers may have a hard time coping with after they are home, and on rest for a couple of weeks or longer.

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Depression, Fatigue, Anxiety, and other mental health disorders can be developed from experiencing instances like I mentioned above.  These can range in severity from mild depression, to severe PTSD, resulting in black outs, isolation, hallucinations, and suicidal ideations.

If you have a soldier in your life, or are a soldier, one who is just back from overseas, or someone who has been home for awhile, or even someone who is still rooted to Canadian soil, we are here for you.

No matter what you want to talk about, whether it is something you have experienced, something you cannot shake, thoughts that you don't want to be having, we are here for you.  No matter what.  

Our phone lines are open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.  We are here to provide support to you, your families, friends, and loved ones, so that you can make it through another day.  Whether it is your first call, or your 50th call, we are always here, that we promise you.

613-238-3311

Welcome home once again, soldiers.  We are proud of you.

Whatever

It's one of those days when you have to force yourself out of bed, for either yourself, work, your kids, your pets, WHATEVER.

It's getting stuck in traffic on a Friday when there's never any traffic on Friday.  

It's forgetting your lunch on the kitchen counter, and not having any cash with you to get something else.

It's dealing with your depression and anxiety, and feeling like you're just in a rut with everything.

It's hearing that someone you care about has been diagnosed with a terrible disease.

It's wanting so much more from your life, but not understanding how to get there.

It's that fight you had with your friend/sibling/co-worker/partner that just was not even worth the arguing.

It's having lost something so very precious to you - a person, an object, a life, a job, WHATEVER.

It's knowing the holiday season is just around the corner and trying to muster up the strength to just get through it in one piece.

It's getting your paycheque and knowing that it's just not enough for your family to keep surviving on.

It's like feeling as if today would have been better without you in it.

It's WHATEVER is affecting your life, that you can reach out and talk to us.

We often blog about different mental health disorders, different coping mechanisms, what's going on in accordance to the time of year, etc.

Today, our blog post is just about one thing: having you know that WHATEVER you are dealing with in your life, we are here for you.

Our crisis line specialists are at our phone stations 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year for WHATEVER you want to talk about.

In fact, this year, we'll have answered over 40,000 calls from people just like you who have been dealing with different issues in their lives that have been affecting their every day.  For some, it may be something that they've been dealing with for a very long time, and they know that we are always there to talk about WHATEVER with them, for others they may be a first time caller, looking for someone to turn to, and we are here.  Honestly, we cannot stress that enough - we are HERE for WHATEVER you need to talk about.  You don't even need to give us your name if you're feeling overwhelmed about calling, but just know that every call is confidential.

If the thought of calling us to talk is just not on the table for you right now, we encourage you to check out our website at www.dcottawa.on.ca to learn more about our services.  

And just remember that no matter what, we are here for you to talk about WHATEVER you need to talk about.

613-238-3311

Mental Health & Pets

A wag of a tail, or a purr, even a blub blub?  (that's supposed to be a fish...)

If you are fortunate enough to have a pet at home, you can understand the unconditional love that your little friend gives you on a daily basis.  

But can pets help with your mental health, depression, anxiety?  Some studies show that having a pet can reduce tension and elevate your endorphins, and improve your overall mental health well-being, when combined with proper treatment - medication, therapy, exercise and eating well.  Having a furry friend to take care of when suffering from mild to moderate depression may help you feel more at ease.

Unconditional love

Unlike relationships with family, friends, loved ones, co-workers, a relationship with a pet just allows you to experience your emotions without feeling judged or hurting someone's feelings.  Your pet will always be there to comfort you, as you are their "parent" in a sense, or their pack leader.

Responsibility

Taking care of a pet is a huge commitment, yes, and it may seem very difficult to grasp taking care of something else while you're hurting, but experts say that adding a responsibility to your schedule can help, giving you a sense of purpose.  Of course, if you're not feeling 100% ready to take on a pet, give it some more time before committing. 

Exercise

If you're like me, you love being a couch potato - because is there anything better than being curled up on the couch with a book or a movie?  Yes, there is!  Pets definitely help with getting exercise!  Dogs especially, because they need to be walked and played with.  Morning, afternoon and night - little walks - and in the meantime - lots of floor or outdoor playing!  A little physical activity will better yourself mentally and physically!

Companionship

Depression may cause some people to become isolated, pulling back from family, friends and loved ones.  If you have a pet at home, you're never alone, and that can make a huge difference.  Of course, if you are isolating yourself, taking time to talk to your family doctor or us here at the Distress Centre is a good way to cope as well.

Getting Out There

Having a pet can help push you to get more social contact.  You won't find too many people who won't want to pet your puppy or talk to you at the dog park, or while waiting at the vet with your cat, etc.  Pet owners love to talk about their pets!


Remember, if you're not ready to get a pet just yet, take time to think about it.  Pets do cost roughly $1500/year to take care of between food and vet bills and other expenses, so it is a commitment.  However, if you're feeling ready to take on a pet, you can rescue one from the Ottawa Humane Society, or you can look at a breeder.  Do your research as to what you want in a pet, and don't be shy to ask employees at a pet store or friends for their advice and best practices.  

As we always like to close our posts off the same way, we are here for you, 24/7 if you need someone to turn to, to talk to, or just some support.  613-238-3311 anytime of day or night.

Self-Harm

Maybe you've been out somewhere and have seen someone in passing, or even a friend, or a co-worker with a bandage on their arm/wrist, or have seen visible scars branding someone's body that seem like they were deliberately placed.  Maybe the thought has crossed your mind "Why would anyone want to cut themselves?"  

Self-harm doesn't just affect one's body, but also their mind, and spirit.  It also just isn't about someone cutting themselves to feel pain or trying to escape life.

In fact, those who participate in self-harm, are often looking to feel better.  Those who are searching this feeling get a "high" from having the power & control over their mind and body, and it can feel euphoric, releasing certain endorphins.  Those who self-harm aren't always looking to end their lives, but in certain situations, this can be their reason for self-harm.  There are also tragic "overdoses" of self-harm where one can accidentally end their lives.

Self-harm doesn't just fall into cutting.  There are many methods people use, and can often move from one to another when that high isn't attainable anymore.

Self-Harm

• Cutting (often with razor blades, scissors or glass)
• Burning
• Hitting
• Scratching or picking at skin
• Hair pulling
• Inserting objects into body

Behaviours also considered as self-harm:

• Smoking
• Drinking alcohol
• Drug addiction
• Food (binge eating or starvation)
• Sex (many partners, unprotected)

Why does someone indulge in self-harm?  There is something in that person's life that is leading them to feel like they need to do this to themselves.  A traumatic experience (past or present), lack of coping skills, difficult relationships, financial woes, death of a family member or friend, battling a mental health disorder, battling a physical disability, issues academically, dealing with sexuality, abusive relationships (emotionally and physically), being bullied, and having issues at work.  There may also be psychological reasons that someone self-harms, such as hearing voices, repeated thoughts of doing it, forcing you to act upon to make the thoughts go away, and it could be a symptom of a borderline personality disorder.  This list is certainly not exhaustive as anything can trigger someone to want to self-harm.  T

How does someone get over the urge to do this to themselves?  Well there are many ways, but it takes time, effort and the person's own desire to stop.

• Cognitive Behavioral Therapy - helps to identify unhealthy, negative beliefs and behaviors by slowly introducing them, and learning to cope with healthy & positive skills
• Dialectical Behavior Therapy - a brand of CBT (above) that teaches behavioral skills to help tolerate distress, manage or regulate emotions and improve relationships
• Psychodynamic Psychotherapy - focuses on identifying past experiences, hidden memories or interpersonal issues at the root of emotional difficulties through self-examination guided by a therapist (source Mayo Clinic)
• Medications - while there are no meds to treat self-harming behavior, a doctor may prescribe antidepressants or other medications to help treat a mental health disorder surrounding the self-harm behavior

If you or someone you know are self-harming, your first step to recovery is to confide in someone you trust.  If you can't confide in someone who is close to you just yet, you can call to talk to one of our amazing volunteers, at any time of day or night. 

613-238-3311

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

"Tap three times on the right, tap three times on the left."

 

"I have to check to make sure the oven is off, the lights are out, the door has been locked.  Okay, check again.  The oven is off..."

 

"My hands are still dirty from that germ-infested bus ride home from work, I'll keep washing them."

 

"If I change my morning routine even the slightest bit, my family will all get sick and die."

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

What is it?  OCD (as most commonly used) is an anxiety disorder in that people who are affected by it, have both obessive and compulsive tendancies.  OCD affects 1-2% of the population, and usually becomes present in late teens-mid twenties, although some people say they noticed

What is the difference between an obession and a compulsion?  An obsession is generally a thought that is disturbing and unwanted, unprovked, that come to mind that are either in the form of an image or an impulse that cause a great deal of anxiety or distress.  A compulsion is a behavior that is deliberate, needed, like washing something, checking something, ordering something, or a mental act like counting & repeating.  Compulsions are acted upon by the person affected to "help to reduce the anxiety" caused by the obession, when in turn can cause additional anxiety.

How is OCD diagnosed?  Well first, the person must be willing to see a doctor.  A doctor will run a series of physical, labratory and pyschological exams.  The doctor will talk to you regarding your thoughts, feelings, how you are physically feeling, how you cope, and what triggers set your obsession and compulsions off.  You may also be asked about thoughts of self-harm, harming others, or suicide ideations.   It is so important to be honest with your doctor about all of the above so that a proper testing and a diagnosis can be made.

What kind of treatment is available for OCD sufferers?  There are a couple options, and depending on what your doctor thinks is best, there may be a combination of the variety.  A type of psychotherapy called "Cognitive Behavioral Therapy" (CBT) may be used - it's an exposure and response therapy.  It involves the person becoming gradually exposed to their obession, and learning healthy ways to cope.  You may do this therapy alone, or your doctor may invite your loved ones who are closest with you to participate as well.

There are also antidepressants and antianxiety medications that may be prescribed, which can elevate levels of seretonin, which with OCD, can be lacking.  There are a few to choose from, and once prescribed, and the person has been taking them for a minimum of 2 weeks, it's ideal to note how you're feeling, how you are coping with the OCD, and what is and is not working for you.  Your doctor will be able to make adjustments of the medication if you find it's not working out. 

Above all, know that you're not alone.  Our volunteers here at the Distress Centre of Ottawa & Region are ALWAYS here for you, no matter what.  613-238-3311 anytime of day or night.

The "Baby Blues"

It's the time of year, where babies are everywhere, and new parents are beaming as everyone coos over their beautiful bundle of joy. 

But, have you ever thought about why lies beneath that smile of a new mom? 

Postpartum Depression (aka: The Baby Blues) affects 80% of women, and not necessarily a "new" mom, as it can affect even the most experienced mom who has gone through other child births.

PPD is a temporary depression, for the majority of women.  With the change in hormones, and the emotions that come with having a baby, it is very easy for those Baby Blues to sweep in.  Throw in the lack of sleep and exhaustion and you have an interesting cocktail of depression, while you're enjoying your beautiful new baby.

On average, after a few weeks after child birth, PPD will start to fade, however there are cases that continue on longer, and a visit to the doctor's office may be required, to ask about the depression, as there many be an underlying problem that you haven't been aware of.  This lingering depression affect 10-16% of women, and should not be ignored.

What are the symptoms of Postpartum Depression?

- Sadness
- Tearfulness
- Trouble Sleeping
- Anxiety
- Feeling of Helplessness
- Mood Swings
- Suicide Ideations* (*extreme cases)

Do not feel ashamed if you are experiencing PPD, because you're not alone.  With many  "Mom & Baby" groups, you can find support through others who have gone through, or are going through the same feelings.  As always, we're always here to provide support and a listening ear, if you're suffering from these symptoms.  Whether you're up at 3am for a feeding, or the baby just won't go down at 11pm, or during a nap time at 1pm in the afternoon, we are always here.

613-238-3311.

Guest Post - Laura

As we continue to post our own blog posts, we have been reaching out to those dealing with a mental health illness or disorder to talk about how they deal and cope.  Today's post comes from Laura, who has suffered from depression most of her adult life. 
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This month I moved.  I have two major deadlines at work.  By March 31 I will have travelled to New York, Vancouver, Montreal and Ottawa.  I have a workshop that I have to participate in and will be evaluated on and I’m nervous.  I’m the maid of honor in two weddings this summer and my duties for those wedding have ramped up.

Needless to say, I’m a little stressed.

As someone who has suffered from depression for most of my adult life, stress and I don’t always get a long.  There are some people that are incredibly productive and resilient during the most difficult times.  Their able to turn stress and anxiety over something into fuel and drive.  For me stress can upset all sorts of things and impact my sleep, my weight, and my general emotional well-being.  There was a time in my early twenties where any stressful situation paralyzed me.  It made navigating the ups and downs of life extremely difficult.

For people that suffer from a mental illness of any sort - scratch that - for ANYONE – learning how to deal with stress in a healthy way can be difficult.  I’m no expert, but in this post I’d like to share a few things with you that I have learned to be incredibly helpful in dealing with stressful times and have helped kept my physically and mentally well.

Reach Out

The first and most important lesson I have learned is that I need emotional support during times of stress.  When I have a lot going on in my life, I know that I have the tendency to feel the weight of it all emotionally.  I get teary, maybe I’m not sleeping as well and in order to build my resilience I need to have an outlet.  For me that outlet comes in the form of a professional with whom I speak twice a month.  Its important that I have someone that helps me to reflect on what’s going on for me and suggest helpful strategies to work through times of difficulty.  A really good friend, family member, coach or mentor can also be a good person to reach out to if speaking to a professional isn’t your thing.  Sharing our challenges can be a good outlet and can go far in helping us unload some of the emotional weight that stress can cause.

Eat well

Pass the peanut butter chocolate ice cream.  Seriously.  Give it to me. 

I have been known to eat my feeling in times of stress.  Anything delicious gives me temporary comfort.  Unfortunately it ultimately it makes me feel a whole lot worse. In order to get through times that are challenging mentally our body needs the proper fuel.  The best thing that you can do is to show yourself some love by taking time out to eat healthy and nutritious foods.  You’ll feel better, operate better and chances are you’ll sleep better if you’re filling your body with whole, nutritious foods instead of a pint of ice cream.

Exercise

When I’m busy with work or travelling I get tired.  Really tired.  As a result, exercise is usually the first thing that gets eliminated from the schedule – I make excuses because I think I just don’t have the energy.  I have learned again recently that this is probably the worst thing I can do.  During times of stress I need to carve out time to sweat.  It helps me shake my sillies out and re-focus.  It also helps me have more energy to keep on keeping on and to do the other things on this list - like making healthy meals and reaching out when I need to.  Endorphins are powerful things!

Theme Music

There are all sorts of studies that connect listening to upbeat or soothing music to improving one’s mood.  For me, a great song can help to distract me and ease tension and anxiety.  Over the past month I have made a conscious effort to turn music on when I’m at home or listen to my iPod more on the way to work to get the positive vibes flowing.  Right now I’m loving Lykke Li’s “I follow” – its upbeat and makes me feel like I can take on the world!

Sleep

I’m not a great sleeper on a good day – ask anyone that has ever shared a bed with me!  I toss, I turn, I sleep walk, I talk – it’s a full day’s work in one night.  So when times get tough my sleep really suffers.  I have found that the best thing I can do during times of stress or just to ensure my resilience is listening to my body and trying to get as much sleep as I can.  I’ve read that turning off electronics (phone, TV, computer) and being conscious of what you’re reading before bed (nothing too heavy) can also have a positive impact your ability to get to sleep and have a restful sleep so these are some strategies I use as well.  Everything seems easier when you are well rested.

This too shall pass

I try to remember when times are tough that this too shall pass and I will get through those things that are challenging for me.   We need to remember to be kind to ourselves and do those things that make us feel good when work or our personal lives seem crazy stressful.  So this month I plan to listen to upbeat music on repeat, get good sleep, eat well and not sacrifice exercise in favour of work.  Maybe doing some of these things will be helpful for you too?

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If you or someone you know, needs to talk, we're here 613-238-3311

 

 

Stream of Thoughts

When I was a tween/teenager, and going through a hard time, my mother encouraged me to write my feelings out.  "Stream of Thoughts" she would call it.  Then, if it wasn't in my diary, and I didn't have anything left in me to write about, to throw that paper away, symbolizing that I could move on from those thoughts.  I find myself more than 17 years since this advice from my mother, doing the same thing today, whenever I need to get thoughts out of my head, or be able to tell someone something.

Often, we hear that callers enjoy writing as a sense of getting their feelings out, but some don't know where to start.  Here are some great ways to get started:

• Choose your topic.  If it's one issue that you are dealing with, go on that.  If it's a bunch of topics, write about one at once.

• Physically use a pen or pencil to write on paper.  Writing on the computer or a tablet gives us too much freedom to delete what we're writing, because we may overthink, and try to protect ourselves or others, even if you're the only one seeing your writing.

• Be in a spot where you can write without being interrupted.  This may be a difficult task, so even if it's somewhere you can write with minimal distractions is better than nothing.  You want to be able to focus on your thoughts, and getting them out.

• The actual writing part can be done as you want it to.  Write in third person.  Write as you are writing a play or a script.  Write just random words.  Write upside down, backwards, in shapes, different colors, or any other method that will help you get your thoughts out.

• Don't be afraid of your emotions.  You may experience anger, sadness, dispair, happiness, contentment, stress, and every other emotion while you're writing - but this is good!  These emotions are being captured by your words that are landing on the paper.

• Keep writing until you run out of words.

• When you find yourself finished with your writing, you can make the choice for yourself whether to keep what you've written in a safe place, share it with someone you care about, or throw it out.  This choice is completely yours and yours alone.

• Take a deep breath when it's all said and done.  You deserve it after getting all of those emotions out.

We're always here to talk, any time of day or night, if you are ready to reach out.  Call us at 613-238-3311 to speak to one of our volunteers.

Anxiety

Imagine your every day being a struggle in terms of fear, shortness of breath, panic, phobia of being around people.  Even going to get a coffee can cause an attack.

Anxiety Disorders are the most common mental disorders in the general population, affecting 10-15%.  Anxiety can range from mild uneasiness to a panic attack - that feeling where the world is crashing down around you, completely falling apart, yet nothing is happening.  Anxiety can last for a few moments, days, months or a lifetime.

Most likely, you have experienced a form of anxiety in your life.  Buying a house, studying for an exam, a loved one being sick, driving in bad weather.  These are all mild cases of anxiety examples, but at any given moment, these examples can become full blown panic attacks, where you just lose complete control of yourself.

People with anxiety often describe symptomes such as: feeling "on edge", difficulty concentrating, irritability, physical symtoms such as trembling or sweating, sleep disturbance, uncontrollable worry that is disproportionate to source and interferes with day to day living.

Anxiety often produces frightening physical sensations as well - shortness of breath is one that can be very scary as people try to breathe, and can't seem to exhale.  Tactics our volunteers take on the phone with callers, are breathing exercises.  "Let's take a deep breathe together, and count to 5".  Often this is helpful for the caller to gain control of how they are feeling so that they are able to talk about what is causing the anxiety.

Another way to cope with anxiety or attacks is focusing on strategies that have worked in the past.  Does going for a walk help you?  Does cooking or baking help you?  Does cleaning help?

Anxiety Disorders are diagnosed by doctors, and can include:

• Generalized Anxiety Disorder
• Panic Disorder
• Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)
• Phobias
• Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)
• Operational Stress Disorder (This is a fairly new disorder, focusing on Military, Police, etc)

A great place to start if you're thinking you are dealing with an Anxiety Disorder, is to visit your family doctor, or a clinic nearby.  We have such amazing resources in the city for our use.

As always, if you are experiencing something you need to talk about, call and speak to one of our amazing Distress Line volunteers.  613-238-3311.