Guest Blog: Dysthymic Dad

In an effort to reach out to those dealing with mental health illnesses, now & then we will be featuring a guest blog post.  These people are dealing with anxiety, depression, bi-polar disorder, stress, and other disturbances to their mental health.

Everyone featured has granted us permission to post on their behalf, to share their stories, their blogs, and hope that you will find solace and comfort in that you are not alone.

Today's post comes from Dysthymic Dad on Twitter.  This man has been very brave in battling his Depression and Dysthymia.  This blog post comes on a snowy day in Ottawa, which makes the analogy he writes about understandable.

Visit http://dysthymicdad.wordpress.com/ for more blog posts from Dysthymic Dad. 

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Depression: Driving Stick-shift, Uphill in Wintry Conditions
   

My mental health muse must’ve taken a holiday, what with over a month since updating this blog. I kept telling myself I should write another entry, but the motivation / inspiration simply would not materialize. Symptoms of my condition? Mayhaps… Meanwhile, I’ve been filling the “creative” void, 140-characters (or less) at a time… hence why you should follow @DysthymicDad!

But I have been giving some thought as to how I could explain what I’m going through, to those I choose to disclose my condition…to come up with an analogy, a “story”, to explain what Depression feels like. Or at least, what it feels like for me. Being Canadian, you know weather had to factor into the story, somehow!

When first diagnosed with Major Depression and likely dysthymia, I’d been stuck at the bottom of the hill for so long, spinning my wheels in 5^th gear, I’d no clue what might lie on the road ahead. At first, the blizzard-like conditions of my depression swirled around me, blinding me to my surroundings. Complete white-out conditions.

What revealed itself to lie ahead was one very steep hill to climb, riddled with unavoidable icy patches. I felt overwhelmed, ill-equipped to weather the wintry storm and topography ahead; I was an old beat-up clunker with balding summer tires, no map and no GPS device. I wasn’t even sure anymore what destination I was trying to reach. My internal On*Star navigation system had completely failed me.

Extended sick leave from a supportive employer allowed me to put some gas in the tank and recharge the battery. With the help of my GP, I equipped myself with winter tires – an anti-depressant called Cipralex – to gain traction on the road to recovery. Both my GP and EAP (Employee Assistance Program) Counsellor were of great assistance in pointing out the destinations that are open to me. 
 And my Mindfulness practices are the polarized lenses that allow me to notice the individual snowflakes, and see through them as I plod ahead.

I have no illusions that conquering this hill will take time. There are still days where I feel stuck in neutral, all traction lost on an icy patch as I slide backwards. Sometimes my GPS acts up when I hit a pothole. Loosening my white-knuckled death-grip on the steering wheel of anxiety doesn’t always come easy. And there will be times when I may need to call out a tow truck to get me out of the ditch.
But progress is being made, one gear shift at a time. Sometimes I do need to downshift, and I’ve learned to accept that, if not outright welcome those opportunities. I’ve given up on *wishing* that the weather clear up, or a sand/salt truck magically appear ahead of me. The road and weather conditions are what they are.

What drives me now is knowing that I will reach the top of this hill. Maybe not tomorrow, or next week, or next month. But one day, I will reach the summit… and hopefully find a level parking lot where I can do doughnuts to my heart’s content.
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As always, the Distress Centre of Ottawa & Region is here for you, at any time, day or night.  You can call us at 613-238-3311 to talk about what you're experiencing.  We're here to support you.

 

Letter Response

Back in January, we came across a "Letter to Editor" in a local Ottawa newspaper. 

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"Talk mental health

Why in 2013 is it still acceptable to openly discuss cancer, stroke, and heart failure, and not mental health?

The mental health crisis line is 613-722-6914. Yet one has to wonder what happens when that number is dialed. Will you immediately speak to a professional? Will you be put on hold or told someone will call you back shortly? Will you be forwarded to a message machine? Is the call confidential? If you’re a parent, will five cop cars and someone from Children’s Aid arrive at the door while you’re on the line? How many then, would make that call with so many unanswered questions?

We hear very little about mental health, no one canvassing at the door, no big gift lotteries offering houses and cars, and I don’t think many are running or biking for it.

So we hear and say very little about mental health, leaving some, perhaps many, to struggle in silence, fearful of being judged."
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We wanted to respond to the writer, as she asked many questions that needed an answer.  While our response wasn't published, it's important for those who have similar questions to see the answers.

This is our response!

RESPONSE

Why don’t we speak more openly about mental health? It affects each and every one of us in one way or another, sometimes without realizing it.

When someone makes the decision to call the Distress Centre of Ottawa & Region or the Mental Health Crisis Line, they’ve taken the initiative to talk about the issues they are facing. When the number is dialed, you are reaching one of our volunteer Crisis Line Specialists. Each of these individuals has undergone 59 hours of extensive training, including the Applied Suicide Intervention Skills Training (ASIST) workshop so that we are prepared to provide support to anyone calling in, no matter what the problem, at any time of day or night.

While the vast majority of calls are answered immediately, it’s possible that if we’re experiencing a high volume of calls, that you may be put into queue, to wait for one of our Crisis Line Specialists to finish supporting another caller. If you are placed in our queue, you’ll hear the message letting you know that we’ll answer your call as quickly as we can. You can be assured that every single call that comes into the Distress Centre & the MHCL is completely confidential and information is not shared outside of the centre, however; if there is an immediate danger to yourself, another person or a child, this will fall under our obligation to involve emergency services. We are here to provide unbiased, non-judgmental support to anyone in need of help, including those dealing with relationship issues, finances, mental & physical illnesses, employment concerns, local resources, sexuality & interpersonal issues and suicide ideations, and much more. Remember - anything that is affecting your day to day coping skills, is a reason to call.

As much as the society is starting to open up and talk about mental health, there is still room for improvement, and we are working hard to get people talking - talking to us, talking to family, friends, co-workers, and even strangers. In fact, the Distress Centre of Ottawa & Region is participating in the Ottawa Race Weekend, and invites others to raise funds and awareness for our Crisis Lines. There is also an annual fundraising event called “A Chocolate Affair” on May 2^nd, to do the same thing.

We invite everyone to learn more about the Mental Health Crisis Line at www.crisisline.ca and the Distress Centre at www.dcottawa.on.ca.    If you need someone to talk to, you can call 613-238-3311 (Distress Centre) 613-722-6914 in Ottawa, 1-866-996-0991 (MHCL) outside of Ottawa. We’re here for you, no matter what.

 

Cracking Up the Capital

Some say that laughter is truly the best medicine, that your heart smiles when you laugh, that it can relieve even that little bit of stress you've been under.

Do you laugh with your kids?  Your friends?  Family?  Co-workers?

How do you laugh?  Are you the silent laugher?  Are you the one who snorts?  Do you giggle or huff?  Do you do the laugh-cry thing, where tears just roll down your face?

Are you easily amused, or does it take something extraordinarily funny to make you chuckle?

Laughter is one of the easiest ways to perk up your mood.  Watching Youtube videos can decrease your stress level significantly, making what you're facing seemingly better or disappear for an instant.

Here in Ottawa, supporting local mental health organizations, is your chance to laugh it up!

Cracking Up The Capital is an amazing comedy festival put on by a team of individuals who all care about the mental health of our community.  They come from all walks of life, with the same end goal of helping those in need who are dealing with a form of mental health.

From February 6-9th, you can see fantastic comedians preform their best material, all while supporting mental health.

Tickets are priced per event, but are set an amazing prices!

Check out www.crackingupthecapital.com for more information and to buy tickets!

Women of Comedy: An Intimate and Interactive Evening

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

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Improv Games: Youth Comedy Evening

Thursday, February 7, 2013

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Aboriginal Comedy Evening

Friday, February 8, 2013

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Festival Finale

Saturday, February 9, 2013

We would like to thank the organizers at Cracking Up the Capital for donating tickets to our own volunteers, for the Festival Finale.  They'll appreciate the laughs!

Beat the Winter Blues

It's that time after the holiday season when it's dark early at night, it's cold, it's wet, the wind is howling, the snow is falling, and all you want to do is hibernate until Spring.

Don't let the Winter Blues and Seasonal Affective Disorder get the best of you.   It's easy to fall into the trap of wanting to just stay in bed, or curled up on the couch.  Heck, I'm guilty of it myself sometimes.

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) can affect anyone.  Those of us in Canada, with long winter nights, are at a greater risk of SAD.  Feelings of hopelessness, appetite changes (increase or decrease) increased sleep & more naps, less energy, sluggish movements, social withdrawl, loss of activities that usually make you happy, irritability and even suicide ideations.

Doctors can't test us for Seasonal Affective Disorder, but your doctor can make a diagnosis by talking to you about your feelings and changes in your behaviour.  You know yourself better than anyone else.  Therapy can provide some relief, by expressing how you are feeling, and we're definitely here 24/7 to talk to you about all of these things at 613-238-3311.

But how can you get through these months, waiting for Spring, warm sunshine, flip flops, swimming and freckles to come your way?

Eat healthy.  Tests have been done that people suffering from SAD, showing that when they ate healthier foods, they felt better about things.  Stick to your four food groups, and everything in moderation.  Bright foods like fruits & veggies are an instant mood improver.

Sleep just the right amount.  8-9 hours is ideal for a good night's sleep. 

If you're on medications, review them with your doctor to make sure you're taking them the right way, at the right time of day.  I recently found out that one of my own doses is better taken in the morning than at night like I was. 

Exercise.  I don't mean run a full marathon in the snow.  Like to snowshoe?  Cross country ski?  Downhill ski?  Simply walk?  Grab a friend, co-worker, loved one, or even the dog and get out for at least 30 minutes a day for fresh air.  It will release endorphins that make you happy, and fill your lungs with clean air.  The Vitamin D from the sunshine is essential.

Avoid alcohol and drugs.  When dealing with depression, these can be a crutch to get you through.  Do your best to steer clear, and try the above tips instead.

Most people live with Seasonal Affective Disorder their entire lives.  It's manageable when you find something that works for you.

If you have thoughts of suicide, please call and talk to one of our Crisis Line Specialists.  We are here to listen, to help and support you.

Stay happy & healthy this Winter season.  Have any other tips?  Share them in the comments section below!

Eating Disorders

I'm sure you've had a meal that you just stuffed your face with every bite in sight, and then waddled your way over to the couch complaining about why you ate so much.  Who hasn't done that around the holiday season when the food is plentiful and oh-so-delicious. 

Or maybe you wanted to fit into that little black dress, so you cut back on your calorie intake or do one of those "fast action cleanses" with water & lemon for a few days.

Or maybe you came home from work and literally ate everything out of your fridge and cupboard.  Like, everything.

Eating disorders are serious but treatable illness with medical and psychiatric aspects.  Anorexia, bulimia and binge-eating disorders are most commonly known.

Bulimia Nervosa is a disorder that is defined by the individual binge eating and purging - making themselves vomit everything they ate.  It often becomes a sense of power, of control of one's body that they are the ones making the decisions for their weight, for their lives.  Often, Bulimia is seen in young women, teenagers, and into 20's - but this is not an exhaustive age range.  Eating disorders can be with someone their entire life, or begin later on in life.

Anorexia Nervosa is an eating disorder defined by the individual drastically cutting their food intake to a dangerous low-calorie level, for the irrational fear of putting on weight.  Even one pound of weight gain can cause someone who is dealing with anorexia into a downward spiral.  Anorexia is most popular in women, at about 85%, while 15% of people dealing with the disorder are men. 

Eating disorders aren't just about binging, purging and starving yourself.  Some individuals have problems with being able to stop eating.  There are people who deal with the fact that they will eat all day long - and not necessarily healthy food.  They may be eating 25 hamburgers a day, buckets of fried chicken, sweets and baked goods.  And while they know what they are doing is not good for them, they simply cannot stop.  They often become immobilized, and dependant on others to fulfill their food intake needs.

Some individuals may take laxative pills or teas to help them with the purging of the food they've eaten.  This can create a real dependency on the OTC drug, cause internal issues that go unseen for a long time.  Ulcers, colon and intestinal wall breakdowns, and more.

Purging (vomiting) causes the stomach to become weak, acid burning away the enamel on one's teeth, causing the esophagus to become inflamed and raw. 

Starving one's self causes weakened organs, the heart to work and beat faster, exhaustion, the muscles to breakdown strength and bones to become brittle.

Over-eating causes heart concerns, obesity, organs to become sluggish and tired.  There is also the financial factor - the food intake can cost hundreds of dollars every couple of days, thousands a month.  Often this individual cannot work, and is supported by others or social assistance.

Many factors play into an eating disorder.  There may be an underlying mental illness, there may be pressure from peers.  Possibly, the person is obsessed with what the perfect body is - when Hollywood calls 150lbs "obese and fat" it's easy for a woman to question herself.  There may have been a traumatic experience in the individual's life, and having this one thing that they are in control of, self-gratifying.  Again, this is not an exhaustive list of possibilities for developing an eating disorder.

Do you have someone in your life who you may fear has an eating disorder?  Here are some signs for you to watch for regarding Anorexia, Bulimia and Purge Eating:

• Constant or repetitive dieting (eg. counting calories/kilojoules, skipping meals, fasting, avoidance of certain food groups or types such as meat or dairy, replacing meals with fluids)
• Evidence of binge eating (eg. disappearance of large amounts of food from the cupboard or fridge, lolly wrappers appearing in bin, hoarding of food in preparation for bingeing)
• Evidence of vomiting or laxative abuse (eg. frequent trips to the bathroom during or shortly after meals)
• Excessive or compulsive exercise patterns (eg. exercising even when injured, or in bad weather, refusal to interrupt exercise for any reason; insistence on performing a certain number of repetitions of exercises, exhibiting distress if unable to exercise)
• Making lists of ‘good’ and ‘bad’ foods
• Changes in food preferences (eg. refusing to eat certain foods, claiming to dislike foods previously enjoyed, sudden interest in ‘healthy eating’)
• Development of  patterns or obsessive rituals around food preparation and eating (eg. insisting meals must always be at a certain time; only using a certain knife; only drinking out of a certain cup)
• Avoidance of all social situations involving food
• Frequent avoidance of eating meals by giving excuses (eg. claiming they have already eaten or have an intolerance/allergy to particular foods)
• Behaviours focused around food preparation and planning (eg. shopping for food, planning, preparing and cooking meals for others but not consuming meals themselves; taking control of the family meals; reading cookbooks, recipes, nutritional guides) 
• Strong focus on body shape and weight (eg. interest in weight-loss websites, dieting tips in books and magazines, images of thin people)
• Development of repetitive or obsessive body checking behaviours (eg. pinching waist or wrists, repeated weighing of self, excessive time spent looking in mirrors)
• Social withdrawal or isolation from friends, including avoidance of previously enjoyed activities
• Change in clothing style, such as wearing baggy clothes
• Deceptive behaviour around food, such as secretly throwing food out, eating in secret (often only noticed due to many wrappers or food containers found in the bin) or lying about amount or type of food consumed
• Eating very slowly (eg. eating with teaspoons, cutting food into small pieces and eating one at a time, rearranging food on plate)
• Continual denial of hunge

Physical Warning Signs

• Sudden or rapid weight loss
• Frequent changes in weight
• Sensitivity to the cold (feeling cold most of the time, even in warm environments)
• Loss or disturbance of menstrual periods (females) 
• Signs of frequent vomiting - swollen cheeks / jawline, calluses on knuckles, or damage to teeth 
• Fainting, dizziness
• Fatigue - always feeling tired, unable to perform normal activities

Psychological warning signs

• Increased preoccupation with body shape, weight and appearance
• Intense fear of gaining weight
• Constant preoccupation with food or with activities relating to food
• Extreme body dissatisfaction/ negative body image
• Distorted body image (eg. complaining of being/feeling/looking fat when actually a healthy weight or underweight)
• Heightened sensitivity to comments or criticism about body shape or weight, eating or exercise habits
• Heightened anxiety around meal times
• Depression or anxiety
• Moodiness or irritability
• Low self-esteem (eg. feeling worthless, feelings of shame, guilt or self-loathing)
• Rigid ‘black and white’ thinking (viewing everything as either ‘good’ or ‘bad’)
• Feelings of life being ‘out of control’
• Feelings of being unable to control behaviours around food
• Fear of growing up/taking on adult responsibility

If you need someone to talk to about yourself and a potential eating disorder, or someone you care about, our Crisis Line Specialists are here 24/7 at 613-238-3311.  We have resources to help you get healthy again.

Holiday Depression

The holidays are here, and for many it's mistletoe, snowflakes, hot chocolate, family, friends, stockings, lights and joy.

For others, this is a dreaded time of year if you're dealing with depression.

There are many scenarios that can contribute to depression during the holidays, and know that you're not alone.  It is more common than most think.  Often you'll hear people say they don't like Christmas, or they're a modern day Scrooge, and are just "Bah-humbugging" through to the new year.

Between the physical demands of the holidays, financial stressors, and relationship woes, it's easy to get pushed down into the dark hole of depression.

We borrowed these tips you can try to keep holiday depression at bay from Mayo Clinic:

1. Acknowledge your feelings. If someone close to you has recently died or you can't be with loved ones, realize that it's normal to feel sadness and grief. It's OK to take time to cry or express your feelings. You can't force yourself to be happy just because it's the holiday season.
2. Reach out. If you feel lonely or isolated, seek out community, religious or other social events. They can offer support and companionship. Volunteering your time to help others also is a good way to lift your spirits and broaden your friendships.
3. Be realistic. The holidays don't have to be perfect or just like last year. As families change and grow, traditions and rituals often change as well. Choose a few to hold on to, and be open to creating new ones. For example, if your adult children can't come to your house, find new ways to celebrate together, such as sharing pictures, emails or videos.
4. Set aside differences. Try to accept family members and friends as they are, even if they don't live up to all of your expectations. Set aside grievances until a more appropriate time for discussion. And be understanding if others get upset or distressed when something goes awry. Chances are they're feeling the effects of holiday stress and depression, too.
5. Stick to a budget. Before you go gift and food shopping, decide how much money you can afford to spend. Then stick to your budget. Don't try to buy happiness with an avalanche of gifts. Try these alternatives: Donate to a charity in someone's name, give homemade gifts or start a family gift exchange.
6. Plan ahead. Set aside specific days for shopping, baking, visiting friends and other activities. Plan your menus and then make your shopping list. That'll help prevent last-minute scrambling to buy forgotten ingredients. And make sure to line up help for party prep and cleanup.
7. Learn to say no. Saying yes when you should say no can leave you feeling resentful and overwhelmed. Friends and colleagues will understand if you can't participate in every project or activity. If it's not possible to say no when your boss asks you to work overtime, try to remove something else from your agenda to make up for the lost time.
8. Don't abandon healthy habits. Don't let the holidays become a free-for-all. Overindulgence only adds to your stress and guilt. Have a healthy snack before holiday parties so that you don't go overboard on sweets, cheese or drinks. Continue to get plenty of sleep and physical activity.
9. Take a breather. Make some time for yourself. Spending just 15 minutes alone, without distractions, may refresh you enough to handle everything you need to do. Take a walk at night and stargaze. Listen to soothing music. Find something that reduces stress by clearing your mind, slowing your breathing and restoring inner calm.
10. Seek professional help if you need it. Despite your best efforts, you may find yourself feeling persistently sad or anxious, plagued by physical complaints, unable to sleep, irritable and hopeless, and unable to face routine chores. If these feelings last for a while, talk to your doctor or a mental health professional.

We are here over the holidays - Christmas doesn't mean that our phone lines are closed.  So if on Christmas Eve, Christmas Day or any day before of after you need someone to talk to, our amazing volunteers are here for you.  Simply call 613-238-3311 or 1-866-676-1080.

Have a safe & happy holiday season from all of us at the Distress Centre of Ottawa & Region!

New Year, New You

2012 has flown by hasn't it?

Does it not seem to you that we were just relishing in the warmest spring, the hot, dry summer, walking in the leaves this unseasonably warm autumn?

And yet, here we are, about 15 days until Christmas, and 22 days until 2013!

Time to start thinking of those 2013 New Year's Resolutions!

Let's see...there's the usual, lose weight, quit smoking, go to the gym, eat better.  These are all great, and kudos to those of you who really stick with it.

But have you ever considered making a difference with your time?

2013 can be the year that you help out thousands of callers at the Distress Centre of Ottawa & Region.

Through 59 hours of training, you'll learn vital tactics to learning how to support callers, without the use of providing advice.  Our job is to lend a supportive, non-judgmental, and unbiased ear.  Sometimes people just need someone they don't know to listen to them, sometimes it's just easier to talk to someone who doesn't know you personally.

You'll also be trained in the Applied Suicide Intervention Skills Training workshop.  This is a 2 day course, that we provide free of charge to our volunteers.  You will learn how to listen for warning signs of someone with suicide ideations.  You get the chance to interact with many others and our very qualified educational managers to learn how to diffuse suicidal intentions, and help the person in need get to a safer place for themselves.

We sometimes hear people "Oh I couldn't do that, I couldn't talk to people who are in distress or suicidal."  And that's the truth - you need to be comfortable, and with all the training that we have each volunteer partake in, by the end of it you will feel comfortable.

Take it from me - I just finished my own training, and 2 days later, I got asked to help out on the phone lines.  And let me tell you, it was a very rewarding couple of hours!

So if you think that your New Year's Resolution will be to volunteer at the Distress Centre of Ottawa & Region - fill out your application today!

www.dcottawa.on.ca